omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
Randomize
