i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
Hey, remember that girl at rocklobster you thought was hot but were to pussy to talk to? You were right, her boobs are fake and she gives the best head on the planet. Can you come pick me up?
You're dead to me.
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
An outback commercial just played and I remembered that guy from Australia Imade out with at the Derby. Great Bachelorette Party, btw.
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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