It was good sex. She was screaming so much I didn't know whether or not my name was Matt or God.
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
I had to replace her wine with red vitamin water. So if she’s alive, you can thank me
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
