yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
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