Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
As girls, Bert & Ernie are not very bangable costumes. At least not by who we'd want to get banged by.
I was kidding. But I promise you I'd still find us the most eligible bangables, even if we dressed up like a dumpster and a prom night baby.
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
Randomize
