i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
Had a slight melanoma scare this morning. Spoiler alert, it was Nutella.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
