definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
I can get there in 20, one question, Drress Code? Stripper Lite (make up may require an additional 5-10 minutes), Suggestive Professor (professor Kamil's cleavage ain't got nothing on me), Daywear, Dyke (and trust me you ain't seen dyke), or Exactly What I'm Wearing Right Now. (all of the above may arrive under a coat and are subject to my level of sobriety. Which is currently like nonexistent).--xoxo you know you love me, Gossip Girl.
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
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