Do you want the good news or bad news first?
bad news
The bad news is i thew up on your bed, the good news is i found out who ate your cheetos.
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
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