Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
Just lectured your brother about using condoms when hooking up with girls he meets online. I should be a fucking life coach
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
Randomize
