y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
So I just chugged the rest of the wine in my mug so I would have something to eat my corn flakes in. With a plastic fork. I need a dishwasher
And maybe a life coach?
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
I am a good friend because I got you a bagel. I am a bad friend because I ate half of it.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
I have aggressive nipples.
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
Randomize