yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
they call him Oral-B. enough said
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
Randomize
