i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
Went to the doctors. She saw my " I love beer" tattoo. All she said was " My drunken tat is of just one word. "Cornnuts.". Then said Mexico was "awesome." And sent me on my way. Yeah. She's my favorite doctor.
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
Randomize
