I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
I just forgot I was standing up.
Def don't remember taking those pics I sent you...but it looks like I was in a car? Shit. Looks like my Uber passenger rating just went up exponentially.
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
Randomize
