we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
How many times can I tell him I wasnt expecting sex before he realizes I'm just too lazy to shave all the time?
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
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