Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
Some mornings I close deals. Other mornings I puke out my window while I’m driving down the highway
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Randomize
