"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
I wanted to dispute a few 411 charges on my phone bill. The service rep told me I called them four times asking for Lady Gaga's number.
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
I left a care package of Jack Daniel's, pancake mix and porn in your apartment. Merry fucking Christmas.
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
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