And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
A little boy walked by his parents room one night, looked through the keyhole, and said "and that bitch tells me to stop sucking my thumb!"
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
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