This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
Nothing like having your house arrest ankle bracelet vibrate and take a moisture sample at the exact moment you're about to blow it in some chick...buzzkill
Yes, you can glue plastic eyes to my dick and take pictures while I'm asleep. If you tell anyone I said you could do that Ima fight you.
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
Randomize
