found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
If a fat man falls in the shower and nobody is in the apartment, does his pride still hurt? Answer: yes
I thought smoking would make her look better, but all it did was enlighten me to her snaggletooth
Sounds like a blessing in disguise
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
I always "accidentally" drop a condom and make sure she sees it's a magnum. By the time I'm inside her and she realizes how small I am, it's all over in a flash and I'm done. Plus, they never call back so I never have to see the girl ever again. #gratefulforprematuretinypenis
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
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