I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
The salesman looked at me like I was crazy when I explained the need for a headboard that had slats so I could handcuff people to it
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
