It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
I saw a penis in my cereal this morning. do you think my cheerios are like professor trelawney's tea leaves?
one can only hope.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess?
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
lol hangovers are for mortals.
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
Randomize
