whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
I love having hate sex.
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
This is a mass text. First one to reply gets head.
Before anyone claims this, this chick is in my boyfriend's phone as "Worst BJ EVER!"
Does that mean you're calling dibs or can I?
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
My Sexting was not on an AP level
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
Randomize
