that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
"it's Wednesday" isn't a good enough excuse to take my debit card and use it for your own drunken needs. You owe me 250 bro
all my money is vodka money
I have never read a truer sentence.
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
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