sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
You called me last night and said you had a vision that a cat made you a sandwich. You were tripping way too hard
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
What happened last night? I just woke up and there's like 15 mcflurry cups on the floor
You don't remember stealing them?
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