every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
Just asked my roommate if she needs one of my old pill bottles to hold her weed during our move tomorrow. What has grad school done to me?
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
I want to fling myself into the sun
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
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