I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
We found your brother, passed out, floating in our pool, with a bottle, on a blow up mattress. How did he mange to walk 2 blocks and get into our backyard?
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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