I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
I just learned how to imitate a trains smokestack. The downside is it makes you look like you ate cocaine. The upside is YOU LOOK LIKE A TRAIN
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
I FOUND THE LEGS
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
Randomize
