You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
Our house smells like week old pizza, beer cans, cigarettes, and depressing career tracks....get lysol.
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
Randomize
