i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
She introduced herself as 'Ann the sober one.' Took me to a coat check and a lost and found. Then offered coffee and breakfast sandwiches. Turns out she's been paying her half of the electric bill running post-party operations.
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
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