the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
I just slammed another champagne, swaggered over to her, pointed across the room at the 20 y/o lacrosse player and whispered loudly, "I brought that one for YOU." I'm getting a raise.
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
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