So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
Randomize