the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
Good morning! So would you prefer me to show up kind of late or on time but looking like I got chewed up and spat out by an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer?
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize
