Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
Um...It has come to my attention that I may have said some rather vulgar things about Sean Connery to you and anyone listening last night, so...I apologize for that. I meant the things I said. But still. Sorry.
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
Today some guy at work told me I had the nicest hair he's ever seen and my response was "thanks I grew it myself". This is why I'm single.
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
Randomize
