we're blogging at a bar
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
It's 4:30 AM and I just walked through a line of 10 deer without them freaking out. I am the campus deer king.
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
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