I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
Randomize
