ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
im in a kiddie pool, high, with a keg in arms reach. If i had a sandwich and a blowjob this would be the best day ever
My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
Randomize
