I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
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