I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
Randomize
