Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
Randomize
