what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
He wants another date...I mean he's cute, but I just am not ready to give up my glamorous single-girl lifestyle here.
you mean the one where you drink out of the carton and don't wear pants?
Yeah, and pee with the door open. It's the little things.
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
Randomize
