I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
I'm seriously gonna die surrounded by a million cats and an unbroken hymen
Apparently I was pointing at birds and yelling "YOU USED TO BE A DINOSAUR!!!"
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
Randomize
