she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
I should start prefacing bondage with girls saying "I know you've read 50 Shades, but there is a 33% you're gonna freakout and go home, while I jerk it alone"
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
Randomize