just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
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