I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
Randomize
