I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
it's like iHOP with fire
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
Randomize
