Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
A particularly funny moment you may have missed; you walked in to the basement to announce that whoever was cooking sausages had left them on the grill for Hella long, only to be told that you were in fact the person grilling. At which point you just said, "the sausages are done" and walked out
How to not get laid: tell him he reminds you of your brother. While having sex. Thanks, vodka.
Randomize
