so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
