I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
There was just a girl standing next to me on the train, wasted, wearing only one shoe. I so wanted to pat her on the shoulder and say "oh honey, we've all been there"
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
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