Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
This morning on my way to work I saw a guy ride his bike straight into a woman and her dog while trying to light a bowl. Thought of you.
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
