I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
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