He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
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