he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
a bus full of elementary school kids may or may not have seen me pissing off my front porch this morning
She told me I should be a condom model.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
Mom just sent me an email. The subject line is "How to avoid a urinary tract infection"
LET IT GO MOM
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
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